Dealing with a Bad Breakup

Going Through a Bad Breakup: How Not to Fall to Pieces

If you don’t know how to move on after a bad breakup, then pay close attention to the following tips.

• Let go of your partner

How to get over a bad breakup? There is no need to beg your partner to stay together and forget all the insults. If a person has decided to leave, then you should accept their decision and let go of the past. Try to understand their decision, there is no reason to fight for something that is already dead. The cessation of all attempts to return a loved one and hopes for their return is vital to your future.

• Put an end to the relationship

This is a necessary step, thanks to which a person will soon feel much better. Of course, it is very difficult to understand that everything is over and will not happen again. If there were numerous problems and misunderstandings in a relationship, then its eventual break up will be salvation for both partners. After some period of time, perhaps both partners will change and be able to reunite once again with new thoughts and new goals.

• Overcoming obsessive thoughts

How can a person withstand a bad breakup when pessimistic thoughts constantly pop into their heads and prevent them from accepting their loss? They torture them and bring lots of emotional pain. There is no need to try to get rid of such thoughts and fight them. You just need to be more distracted by the positive moments and think only about the good things around you. There are lots of ways to distract yourself from bad thoughts, getting yourself a pet, signing up for a gym, going on a vacation, etc. As soon as bad thoughts leave, it will get easier for a person, and they will stop feeling all the suffering and pain caused by a breakup.

• Forgive your partner and yourself

How to handle a breakup when you still love them? The main problem of a breakup is all of the bad things two partners have told each other. Perhaps, a partner did lots of horrible things to you, but there were also some good moments since a relationship became a thing in the first place and existed for some time. You should remember only good things about your partner and forgive their mistakes. We are what we are, and we need to accept ourselves. If a breakup happened, it means that it was necessary, and it didn’t happen just because there are some flaws in the character of a person.

• Learn to find positive things in a breakup

If you don’t know how to get her back after a bad breakup – just give yourself some time. Any breakup implies some positive changes in your life. Any difficult situation is a test for a person, having passed which they will become stronger and will strive for perfection. Also, after a breakup, there is complete freedom of action. You can go to a restaurant at any time, take a walk with your friends, or just find a Ukrainian bride, no one is there to restrict you.

How to Handle a Bad Breakup With Dignity?

Here's a list of all important don'ts of a bad breakup.

• Thinking about loneliness and existentialism. Nobody needs you anymore

There is no need to exist for you, no one will ever love you again. Such thoughts may pop into your head while you are coping with a bad breakup. And therefore, you are unhappy, sad, it makes no sense to live anymore, you are constantly crying because you’ve lost a big part of your life. First of all, all the tears don’t make you more handsome, they make you look weak. Secondly, you must learn to not look back, you will never be able to change the things you’ve left behind and thus, it is important to focus on the future that is ahead of you.

• Waiting for a partner to come back

This is one of the worst ways of dealing with a bad breakup. Even if there is a chance that you may reunite one day – today is not the day to do it, give it some time, both of you have to rest and rethink all of the things that happened and all of the things that were said. But consider the fact that the “success rate” for relationships that broke up at one point or another is pretty low. If there was a problem in a relationship and it was not addressed – there is no reason to reunite. If you’ve had lots of discussion with your partner, and you are absolutely sure that the problem is in them and not you, then you should ask yourself – can your partner truly change their ways? Can they come to realize that they were wrong and they are to blame for your breakup? If not, they don’t come back, move forward, if a person is unable to adapt themselves and change their ways and behavior to make their partner happy, even if a breakup is a potential outcome – don’t even bother. Start focusing on the future, think about all of the things you wanted to do for a long time, think of all the free time that you have on your hands.

• Blame it all on yourself or on your partner

These two outcomes are very much different, but they come from the same exact place. This place is foolishness, and to think that one in particular is to blame for a breakup is stupid, at least most of the time. Sure, cases differ, and we cannot know for sure whether or not a partner or you are to blame for a breakup. However, in the first case, if a person is blaming themselves for a breakup, they should understand that a relationship is not a one-sided affair, it involves two people that were unable to find common ground on something. You are both to blame for that, or rather, no one is to blame, it’s a natural outcome that happened between you two, you did not commit something awful. As in the case of blaming your partner, relax, have some dignity.

Look back and try to look at your actions and the things you’ve said from a critical perspective. It may be the case that you aren’t that saint after all. Once again, it may be easier at a first to move on after a breakup if you feel like your partner is to blame, and that’s fine, but don’t do anything stupid. Don’t threaten your partner, don’t assault them, don’t try to ruin their future relationship, don’t interfere with their life, this is the worst thing you can possibly do.

• Battling your grief with liquor

How to move on from a bad breakup? One of the most popular ways of doing it is to get drunk. Sure, you can get wasted right after a breakup, and it can quite possibly make it easier for you to go through this terrible process, but don’t overdo it. If you don’t know how to handle a breakup, then this is not the way to do it. You must remember what a dangerous pit it is, it is great if you always know your limits and if you can control yourself while drunk, but don’t think of it as a solution to all of your problems, it isn’t.

What to Do After a Bad Breakup?

You can cope with depression on your own or with the help of experienced psychologists. If you are not yet ready to turn to professionals, try to start by searching for the cause and trying to battle it yourself.

Every person needs love and care. And as soon as a person faces some problems in their relationship – they feel like they are under lots of pressure, and this is because they are. Lots of people find it hard to move on after a breakup. It is rather difficult to overcome your emotions, and your brain will remind you of all either the best or worst moments that you’ve had with your partner, depending on your mindset. But you should remember that no relationship is perfect, no relationship is without a problem, and they all have their good and bad moments.

If you are still not sure how to handle a bad breakup, then here are some additional tips that may help you out.

• You cannot hide your feelings

The worst thing that a person who is in a difficult emotional state can do is to conceal all of their emotions to themselves. Remember, you will not be able to hide your feelings for long. And all the accumulated negative emotions will come bursting out of you at one point or another. If you want to scream – scream. If you want to cry - cry. But do not keep anything inside you. Talk to your close people, tell them about your feelings. Sometimes a personal diary helps cope with a breakup. Write down your thoughts, describe the feelings that have settled in your head. Do not forget that sometimes depression and relationships are closely linked.

• Be selfish!

How to deal with a bad breakup? Devote attention to yourself! A breakup in a relationship should not be wasted on negative feelings. Take care of your appearance.

Instead of spending time on a couch or just laying on your bed, go for some shopping. Try changing your style. A great option to cope with negative thoughts is to get a regenerating and relaxing massage. After a strong emotional shock, massage will help you relax, forget about all of the terrible things that happened and have fun. In general, try to do something that will distract you from the past. Depression will go away, and relationships that haven't worked out will eventually be forgotten.

• Get a pet

Remember that you can take care and love not only to people. Often, animals save us from negative thoughts. There is no need to buy a purebred puppy or a kitten. Go to a shelter for homeless animals and take an animal that you like. Give them your tenderness, and they will certainly be grateful to you. By hugging your pet in the morning, you will understand how to survive a breakup with your loved one without pain and suffering.

• Get rid of unnecessary things

Here’s an important tip on how to cope with a bad breakup. Throw away all the things and accessories that remind you of past relationships. Avoid public places and establishments where you loved to spend time with your ex-partner. Try to completely shut yourself off from everything that can remind you of them. Delete all of the movies and music that you watched together from your computer. Your relationship has ended, it's time to find new hobbies and new ways to live your life.

• Look for new emotions and impressions

If you are going through a bad breakup, change your setting, it will help survive a bad breakup. Go on a trip or visit a friend who lives in another city. If you cannot leave your city, then try not to sit in one place: go to museums, go to the suburbs on weekends, sign up for courses, move some stuff around or do some repairing. The main thing is to understand that to return to past relationships is already meaningless, it's time to look for something new.

• Take action

How to recover from a bad breakup? Immerse yourself in work or studying. This will allow you not only to shift attention in another direction but also to improve your skills. As a result, you will receive praise from your superiors, and you will become better. With a good attitude, you will quickly understand how to survive the pain of a breakup.