Many people wonder: what are the ingredients of a true and lasting love potion? What is the key to a healthy relationship? How can you keep a relationship alive for a long time? The fact is that there are no magic ingredients that always contribute to a satisfactory relationship, but doing things together is an important part of it.
Everyone wants to have a healthy relationship with their significant other, but how do you know if your relationship is going well? Today we're going to answer this tricky question.
Basic 3 keys to a healthy relationship
Communication
Communication is the key to a healthy relationship. You should be able to freely share your feelings and thoughts with your partner and talk to them about anything. Couples who follow the path of open communication feel much more confident in their relationships.
Fairness
Honesty is the key to a healthy relationship. Open communication ensures that your partner is perceived objectively in the relationship, so you can be honest with your partner. While honesty supports the bond of trust, it will also make the relationship more comfortable psychologically.
Trust
Trust is one of the key ingredients to a healthy relationship. No one can build a healthy relationship and be happy with someone they don't trust. Developing a trusting relationship with our partner after establishing an honest and open way of communicating will save us from the doubts that will wear us down in the relationship. We should remember that building a trusting relationship is the key to having a healthy relationship.
Other keys to having a healthy relationship
Being willing to accept your partner as he or she is
You've probably heard that you shouldn't start a relationship hoping to change your partner over time. Whether it's very serious problems like drug addiction or little things like not washing the dishes all the time, if you expect him or her to behave differently, you're likely to be disappointed.
Yes, people can and do change, but they have to want to. You can't force your partner to change, no matter how much you love him or her. Understanding this is the key factor to a healthy relationship.
Respect
Mutual respect is a key component to a healthy relationship, because partners take into consideration each other's feelings and treat their partner the way they would like to be treated. Respect eliminates situations where one partner feels that the other is pressuring or trying to manipulate them. They are ready to listen to each other and respect their partner's point of view.
Mutual aid
One of the key points to a healthy relationship is that partners have common goals. They are not trying to put sticks in each other's wheels, not competing, not trying to "beat" each other. Instead, mutual assistance and support prevail in the relationship.
Physical and emotional safety
Partners do not feel wary or tense in each other's presence. They know that they can rely on their partner in any situation. They don't have to fear that their partner might hit them, yell at them, make them do something they don't want to do, manipulate them, humiliate or shame them.
Keys to maintaining a healthy relationship
Relationship reinforcers and relatedness
Reinforcers are stimuli that make certain behaviors more likely. For example, if one partner receives a kiss every time they cook something delicious, it is likely that they will want to cook something even tastier the next time.
In this case, the kiss will be a reinforcer because it leads to more frequent cooking of delicious food. When you stop doing something together, both partners have fewer opportunities to use reinforcement.
If you don't do pleasurable things together, there is no opportunity to use reinforcers, and therefore, such behaviors are much less likely to occur. So, from a relationship psychology perspective, doing enjoyable things together is an effective solution that usually yields good results.
As a rule, couples unite because of kinship. Therefore, it is generally accepted that you can do enjoyable activities together that can serve as reinforcement for both of you.
The purpose of this is to reuse the reinforcers that you have stopped using. Just because you don't use them anymore doesn't mean they are outdated. Reinforcers don't just stop working. Instead, most people just tend to forget about them.
Enjoyable things to do together for a healthy relationship
When a relationship goes bad, it's likely that both partners won't want to do things together. That's the main problem with nice things to do. That's why it's helpful to start slowly. If a couple hasn't traveled for more than 8 months, maybe a two-week trip to Panama isn't such a good idea.
However, small things that are enjoyable for one or both partners can be a good idea. For example, walking the dogs, cooking dinner, or buying bread together are simple things that can build reinforcement. As you progress, one or both partners may suggest having dinner together at a favorite restaurant, going to a movie or party.
Of course, there is a chance that they will do these things again. Many couples who go to therapy because their relationship is deteriorating start doing pleasant things together automatically after taking simple steps first. They are the ones who initiate going to buy bread for dinner together.
The latter is just one example of how behavioral techniques are useful at the beginning of couples therapy: the first thing you need to do is look for reinforcers.
Keys to building healthy relationships: conclusion
Does your current relationship meet these criteria? If not, it may be worth listening to your intuition. Deep down, you know if your current partner is right for you. Remember that loneliness, hormones and "butterflies in the stomach" can cloud the mind of even the most sensible woman. But a clear understanding of what constitutes a healthy relationship will help clarify the picture - say "goodbye" to a hopeless romance and get to know your man when he shows up on your doorstep.
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